by Stephanie Hayes
Are the terrible two a myth or not? Some parents swear their kids never had it and some others say their children had it until they enter kindergarten. Toddlers love to explore new things and they do not have our knowledge of what is wrong and what is right. They also are learning their limits and occasionally they like to push it as far as they can. The result? A big meltdown and they usually do not mind if it’s at home or in public where it happens. Every parent has their own technique to deal with this situation, sometimes with great results and some other times it just gets worse. So what is the best way to deal with their little (or big) moment without losing your mind? I observed some parents ignoring their children behavior until they stopped. It looked so easy and simple, I tried that with my child and it made it worse. Getting irritated at him always made things worse. It also did not work very well just leave the store in the middle of my shopping. When we go back immediately after he calmed down outside (or in the car), he would do it again and again. I started to surf the Internet to find the best kept secret about toddler’s meltdown. The first answer I found is, before you go out make sure your children ate and are not tired. In a perfect world, of course my child will never be tired, but the reality is, like adults, children also have bad nights when they do not sleep well and we cannot always withdraw our day because of it. Second solution is to bring something for them like food, a toy, or a game to make them stop. Like many parents, I always try to bring something to do for my kid when we go out, unfortunately it does not always prevent a meltdown. Nevertheless, it made me think, what if I bring a distraction that he rarely gets the chance to eat or play with as a persuasion if a meltdown occurs. Then again, we cannot just bribe our toddlers every time they are getting mad in public. This is when I decided to be more vigilant on how my son is acting right before a meltdown is about to happen. He usually shows some signs that he is tired, like changing position in is little sitting area in the shopping cart every five seconds or yawning. So now, when I see these signs starting, I take out of my purse the “special treat” I have for him. He has no clue why I’m actually doing this and it does stop him from having a sudden meltdown. I like to give him a toy that is more advanced for him, or a toy he hasn’t seen in a while for those moments. Snacks are also a good way to prevent a crisis, but I want him to be happy with a healthy snack. I love to mix cut fruits with granola or a few chocolate chips. If you like to bake, healthy homemade muffins or loaf of bread are great. I like to add fruits (fresh, frozen or dry) to my baking. They make the treat healthier and you can cut on the sugar in the recipe since fruits are already sweet. Also adding to the usual cheese and crackers some fruits can be very good, like some sliced pears or apples. Finally, if after all these tricks your child is still having a big meltdown, the solution is be very patient and compassionate to indicate them the right way to act. I hope these tricks will help you next time you go out or you just want moment peacefulness in your home. If you have some questions or suggestions email me at stephbhayes@gmail.com
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